a blonde year

A BLONDE'S YEAR IN REVIEW:
January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.
February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels .... "duh" .... bottles won't fit in typewriter!!!!
March - Got excited .... Finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months .... box said "2-4 years!"
April - Trapped on escalator for hours .... power went out!!!!
May - Tried to make Kool-Aid .... 8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!!
June - Tried to go water skiing .... couldn't find a lake with a slope.
July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition .... learned later, other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!!
August - Got locked out of car in rain storm .... car swamped, because top was down.
September - The capital of California is "C" .... isn't it????
October - Hate M & M's .... They are so hard to peel.
November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days .... instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!!
December - Couldn't call 911 ..... "duh" .... there's no "eleven" button on the phone!!!!

What a year!!!!